Travelling Teacher

Originally printed in Good Teacher Magazine: Term 1, 2009, pages 32 – 36

After setting of from, Cappadocia as per my last musings, LOMLF and I arrived in Istanbul 18 hours later.

The bus trip was uneventful apart from the dog that was run over by the bus and the driver’s complete disregard for the rules of the road.

In Turkey they are meant to drive on the right side of the road but it seemed that our driver and all the others that we passed, and who passed us, had forgotten this.

The rule apparent was that you drive in the middle of the road and only pull over to the right when someone is coming the other way, or if a faster vehicle comes behind you and gives a polite tap of the horn, normally of 30 seconds duration. If you are coming to the brow of a hill then “ensha Allah” applies (“if God wills”). So it was only by the “Will of God” that Lomlf and I arrived at all. At the third or fourth near miss you tend to relax in a dazed adrenalin depleted stupor and allow life to wash over you.

Read the rest of this entry »

Originally printed in Good Teacher Magazine: Term 3, 2008, pages 28 – 30

Well it took LOMLF* and I some days to get over the fact that our visas had been revoked but all the while we had to work out a way to say goodbye to the kids.

We discussed various options.

The normal way:- having a get together of the parents and the kids and the usual speeches where everyone wishes you all the best etc.

The New Zealand approach:- where we all get together over a few bottles of wine and everybody gets totally plastered. (At least here in Goreme when we send a person to the liquor store for more supplies they don’t take along a “22” rifle.)

Read the rest of this entry »

Originally printed in Good Teacher Magazine: Term 2, 2008, pages 28 – 30

“For gods sake turn the light off!” I hiss to Lomlf*. She hurriedly turns the light off in our decrepit garret of a flat in the middle of Goreme. We’re on the second floor and I’m hiding behind the curtain watching a man across the road who seems to be doing nothing. But he has been there for over an hour now. He’s dressed in a long raincoat and dark glasses for goodness sake, even though its night. It looks like the same guy who has been there for 4 days. He seems to be just hanging about there waiting. What for, we don’t know, but it’s getting right up our collective noses. Lomlf seems to think that he‘s also been following her to school. There has been a rumour going around the neighbourhood of a stranger in the area and we have come to the decision that he is a stalker and has targeted Lomlf.

Read the rest of this entry »

Originally printed in Good Teacher Magazine: Term 1, 2008, pages 28 – 30

Xmas was fast approaching, as was the end of year xmas concert.

Now you may be wondering why I am using the word xmas rather than the other word that denotes that it is a religious festival. As you probably know Turkey is not necessarily a Christian country although there are a lot of Christians in the country.

Not wanting to annoy anybody who’s name starts with Osama or some such who may be lurking in the caves that surround Goreme I decided to use the more usual version which denotes that it is just a shopping festival.

Now the Turks can understand that, as their whole lives revolve around the fact that shopping is a good, if not a sacred, pastime. This is as long as you’re buying my or my brothers or cousins or cousins-cousins carpet, Turkish coffee set or backgammon board or whatever. Read the rest of this entry »

Originally printed in Good Teacher Magazine: Term 4, 2007, page 32 – 34

Ever had one of those dreams where you are flying through the air with no visible means of support (very much like us teachers), where everything is deadly quiet around you, you have this wonderful view of the surrounding countryside, the wind is ruffling through what is left of your hair, you believe you are one with the gods when suddenly you crash and come to your senses.

Well welcome to hot air ballooning Cappadocia style. Read the rest of this entry »

Originally printed in Good Teacher Magazine: Term 3, 2007, page 26 – 28

Goreme

Isn’t it amazing …
that there are certain things that will bring tears to your eyes either with joy, sadness or laughter.
Things like a new born baby,
a painting by Gauguin,
a beautiful sunrise over an azure sea,
an unresponsive computer that won’t do what it’s told,
a class of children in their best finery ready for action with their faces painted like Red Indians.

All of which leads me quite nicely into my next episode on travelling through Turkey. If you remember I had travelled down through Turkey having been to Troy, Ephesus, Assos, and having had a few challenges with the car and tires on the way. Read the rest of this entry »

Originally printed in Good Teacher Magazine: Term 2, 2007, page 26 – 29

Ayah Sofia

Dear Editor
How quickly the last months have flown past. Ever since my epic school trip through the Louvre almost a year ago I have been like one of those aimless brown leaves being blown from one corner of the playground to another.

However just to bring you up to speed on the news. After that excellent trip to the Louvre I was asked to appear before the Board and told in a very Gallic way that although I was an excellent teacher the exuberance I brought to my subjects was a little flamboyant for the school. I was also informed that the fact that I had been Frogmarched (pun intended) out of the Louvre by a regiment of the foreign legion was bad for the reputation of the school and would I consider another posting say to somewhere like say Turkey. Read the rest of this entry »

or…timely tips for a kiwi going away from home

Originally printed in Good Teacher Magazine: Term 1, 2007, page 26 – 27

Dear Editor
After spending some 23 days travelling through Italy, France and London I wanted to share a few travel secrets that I picked up along the way.

These may or may not help you to negotiate the cobbled paths that beset the unwary traveller as you wend your weary way from coffee to café through Europe.

Toilets (bogs to us Kiwis)

1. For the month before you leave home do your exercises.
a) Pelvic floor clenches.
b) Squatting with backpack on and money belt around chest just below breasts. Read the rest of this entry »

Originally printed in Good Teacher Magazine: Term 4, 2006, page 20 – 21

Dear Editor
I am a New Zealand teacher who has a position in an English speaking school (year 10 to 13) in Paris for children of expats.

I decided that it would be a good idea to take the little darlings for a day visit to the Louvre. I did all the usual things, sent out a form to get the parents permission and asking them to sign form NUMBER 34561865rjd43654hgrS362 which says that the school will accept no responsibility for any damage to priceless works of art. Read the rest of this entry »