February 28th, 2010
Leaving Turkey in style!
Originally printed in Good Teacher Magazine: Term 3, 2008, pages 28 – 30
Well it took LOMLF* and I some days to get over the fact that our visas had been revoked but all the while we had to work out a way to say goodbye to the kids.
We discussed various options.
The normal way:- having a get together of the parents and the kids and the usual speeches where everyone wishes you all the best etc.
The New Zealand approach:- where we all get together over a few bottles of wine and everybody gets totally plastered. (At least here in Goreme when we send a person to the liquor store for more supplies they don’t take along a “22” rifle.)
Then we hit the jackpot.
As it was almost time for the summer solstice we thought we could have a little play to send us off. We quickly convened an emergency meeting of the afore mentioned war committee, to discuss the different ideas that we were sure would be brought to the surface by our over-intelligent classes.
As it was a combined meeting of both our classes we had to have it in the playground as neither classroom was big enough. We trooped out our children in single file and organised them into a half circle around LOMLF and I.
After explaining the situation to them all and fielding the comments such as why we hadn’t shot the gentleman concerned (seems that Turks and New Zealander’s do have that in common) we started to get down to tintacks.
I had recently been sent a piece out of the Bay of Plenty Times about an aerial display that had been performed at the Tauranga Airport. It was of the battle between the Germans and the British in the Second World War. I suggested that we re-enact the battle between the Turks and the Anzacs during the 1st World War. Anything to do with fighting really interested all the boys (junior classes as well) and as we explained to the girls they could be nurses. We already had a donkey (remember the donkey? …refer to the Xmas story – Term 4 2007) to re-enact that famous painting of the wounded Anzac soldier being transported by donkey back to the beach. We had a balloon (refer to the trip by balloon across Cappadocia) so we could drop flour bombs on all and sundry. We even had the trowels to dig mini trenches with. All we really needed was some rifles and someone brave and smart to be Ataturk and some idiot to be the Anzac commander.
Unfortunately the young lads hadn’t yet started to grow to their finished height but there was one young lady who was not only the tallest in the class but also the brightest. Why not a woman Ataturk I thought. LOMLF of course seeing the chance to pierce the glass ceiling agreed whole heartedly.
When I described to the massed classes what was required for the British Commander (rather stupid, no idea of tactics, a rather cavalier attitude towards the safety of others), surprisingly, the vote was unanimous in my favour.
We decided that planning for the war would be out of character as there was little or none in the real thing so we decided that we would divide the classes in half and just let them have a go at each other. We were approaching close of school on Friday and our last day at the school was Monday.
So to recap, our thought was to have the play after lunch on Monday. Well we spent the rest of the day writing out invitations to all the parents and I sent a combined invitation to the teachers. I omitted to send one to the Headmaster as I knew that he would be delighted to be surprised at this wonderful reenactment of one of the few victories that the Turkish army ever had.
I sent all of our young soldiers and nurses home and asked them to get their parents to make them replica guns out of wood or whatever material was at hand. I also asked for bandages as I was sure that they would be required as I had a feeling there may be casualties of some sort during the fracas.
I asked the young Ataturk to stay behind and also the oldest of my soldiers who were going to be fighting for the allies.
With Ataturk we went through the basic order of battle where she/ he falls back before the invading force and then with great courage rouses her troops to regain the lost territory and win the day.
The weekend was spent rounding up the balloonist, the donkey and copious quantities of tomato sauce.
Monday arrived and all looked great for a well executed war. The sky was clear, the temperature was in the 20’s and the kids looked eager to go. They had succeeded in persuading their parents to make weapons for them which all looked fairly convincing. We had spent all morning using our trowels and digging fairly minor trenches in the playing fields. Ours were slightly deeper than the Turkish ones at about 40cm deep. With the rampart in front it gave almost 80cm of cover. The Turkish trenches were a little shallower at about 60cm of cover.
Immediately after lunch we lined up the troops on opposite sides of the battle field (playground) and I gave my troops a rousing rendition of “we will fight them on the beaches” using my best Churchillian accent.
The young Ataturk could be seen striding amongst her troops rousing them and reminding them that this was not for real. This had a far greater significance than that original conflict. This was in front of their parents and they certainly didn’t want to look like cowards… did they.
We had the donkey tied up beside my troops and the teachers and parents were sitting along the front of the school.
As soon as I saw the balloon appear over the cave houses I shouted to my troops “Forward”. They leapt to their feet and waving their guns and swords ran straight for the Turkish ranks. Unfortunately for us LOMLF had decided that the Turks may require a little help and had become a turncoat and was now seen popping up amongst the other side (female solidarity with Ataturk I think).
Unbeknown to me she and Ataturk had spent all weekend making flour bombs. As we raced forward we were met with a wall of flour bombs which caused a hurried retreat back to our trenches.
At this stage the balloon appeared closer over head and started dropping flour bombs indiscriminatly. Obviously they had not been trained in the art of aerial bombing as they seriously missed their targets. The bombs started dropping amongst the teachers and parents.
At this stage both Ataturk and I launched our counter attack against each other. The troops met in the middle of the ground as I tried to direct the war from my bunker (the gardeners shed) some way behind the trenches.
As the noise and confusion escalated the donkey became seriously worried and started jerking at its halter. With a final neigh of fear it pulled the halter off the post holding it, and made a beeline for the front door of the school. Terrified it lost control of its bowels just as it entered the school entrance and just outside the Headmaster’s office door.
Hearing the shouting and screaming the Headmaster opened his door and stepped into ….. Well you know the rest. He wasn’t at all happy but the good thing was that there was nothing he could do about it.
All in all a great result. Only minor injuries resulted and we all felt that this was a fitting send off. The war had no real outcome very much like the original.
Tuesday bright and early LOMLF and I boarded the bus to Istanbul on the first leg of our trip to our new positions in Florence.
It was sad to say goodbye to all the neat kids but it was also good to be back on the road again. When you get the travel bug you can only spend so long in one place. I felt that it was time we moved on.
See you next time and travel safely.
* LOMLF= Love of my life fiona
For privacy reasons all photos are merely representations of the people mentioned in this story.
As usual, the Editor takes no responsibility for the Travelling Teachers meandering mind!